Dear Roadie,
My 19-year-old son wants to get married so Uncle Sam will “kick in more scratch” for his girlfriend’s financial aid. They’ve been together since middle school, and they insist they’re certain they will get married at some point, so why not move up the date and reap the rewards of more financial aid? I want to be supportive, but it seems like a weird reason to get married, plus they’re so young! Is this a terrible idea?
— Wondering When the Wedding Is
Dear Wondering When the Wedding Is,
Marital status can be a factor when determining eligibility for financial aid, but before we get into that, let’s talk about the obvious.
Nineteen is a young age to get married. The average age in America right now is 30 for men and 28 for women, so they’re about a decade ahead of everyone else. If your son hasn’t earned his degree yet, chances are he’s not earning much, if any, money, even if he has a part-time job. If his girlfriend is looking for more “scratch” for financial aid, then something tells me she’s not earning much, either.
Committing to marriage when neither party earns enough money to take care of themselves, let alone each other, is generally not considered a good idea. Neither is getting married primarily to get more financial aid.
I understand that they’ve known each other for years and I can certainly believe that they are in love, but is this the best reason for them to marry right now? Marriage is a big commitment, and if they’ve never lived together before, that will also take some adjusting. While it may sound fun and exciting now, marriage can be stressful — college, too. Doing both at the same time might be challenging, especially now, when neither of them has much life experience to draw from.
Have an honest conversation with your son and his girlfriend about the pros and cons of getting married now, as well as the realities of being married that extend far beyond the possibility of more financial aid. Just try not to sound judgy or you’ll risk them making decisions without you, both now and later.
Married Couples and the FAFSA
Now let’s talk dollars. Being married isn’t necessarily better than being single when it comes to financial aid. It’s how marriage impacts your dependency status that’s important.
Any student under the age of 24 is considered a dependent and as such must submit their parents’ financial information as part of the Free Application for Federal Student Aid, or FAFSA. This means their income and assets are taken into consideration when determining how much, if any, a student will receive.
Getting married means forfeiting that in favor of independent status. For young married couples without assets or income, being considered independent can lead to a lower student aid index (SAI), which could have a positive impact on financial award eligibility.
But if one or both of them secures a job with a steady income, that will have to be reported, and depending on how high or low their salary is, that can also impact any financial aid awards.
This would be a great time to meet with a financial aid counselor at the school they’re planning to attend to learn more about how marital status can impact financial aid. If either set of parents has limited assets and resources, your son and his girlfriend may discover that it’s more beneficial to remain dependent. A financial aid counselor can help them figure that out.
Whatever they choose to do, try to support them as best you can. They’re adults and legally able to make their own decisions. The last thing you want to do is alienate them or damage your relationship because they feel you’re not on their team.
You’ve raised your son well and taught him how to make good decisions, but that doesn’t mean there won’t be mistakes along the way. Who knows? This decision may turn out to be the best one they ever make. All you can do is advise them and love them, then pledge to support them no matter what.
Have a perplexing college question? Email Dear Roadie for advice at dearroadie@road2college.com
